everyonelives | i'm leaving you my last curse

( She takes the hug, suddenly very tired, and having to help with a Thanksgiving meal, but she's already thought of his "punishment" as the hug ends.

She pushes the chair out from the table and stands. She wishes she could contribute more. )

I was teaching yoga then and spending a lot of time at this bar by the house ( She gives him the names of both the yoga studio and the bar. ) I'm sorry I can't be of more help. And I really hope you find answers to your questions, because I don't have any. ( She doesn't blame her son for having some, however. ) Okay. While I sit with that, I'm going to go help Rudy and see if he needs anything in the kitchen. And, after you two talk, I suggest you come in and help us. You know we're a team in this house.

( She kisses her son's forehead, sighs, smiles at Dickerson and heads into the kitchen. )

I need wine. What can I help with?

( And back outside in the dining room, Dickerson cants his head for Ben to follow him back upstairs to his old room. This is still Ben's thing, and after closing the door, he turns to his friend.

"Dude." )

I know.

[He exhales hard as he drops down onto his bed, rubbing at his eyes.]

My timing there was not the greatest.

You said what you said when you said it.

( Never mind the hour he had in the garage, the two before that, any day before today -- yeah, his timing was crappy. But, timing just is crappy. Always. So, he's not knocking his timing. )

Why now?

Fuck if I know.

[He wishes he did have an answer.]

It's not the first time that I've like ... pulled it up on my phone or whatever. I ordered the DNA kit weeks ago and was just not pulling the trigger. I shouldn't want to know. Like shit, it's not like I need a dad. I've got Rudy.

[Which isn't the most ringing endorsement, but he knows that Rudy has been more than happy filling the role when needed to.]

I guess I got to the point where I just couldn't handle the question mark, you know? Like I figured maybe if I just can put a name to it, maybe that would be enough.

And you stuck to your guns.

( Bandaid's ripped. )

Hey, I'm not knocking you. If there was a mystery or something I could learn about my mom, I'd do it. I'd find out. But, you know I'm a digger.

( That's the thing, normally, he's the digger. )

Look, you could've lied and told me alone, but you admitted everything. So now she's a part of this. Maybe that's not a bad thing.

I wouldn't have kept her out of it anyway. I mean she knows as much as I do anyway.

[And he's never judged her for that. It's not like these things don't happen.]

I just thought maybe I'd see if there was actually something there to the whole Milligan thing before I got her hackles up for nothing.

Her hackles aren't, yeah, okay, she's hackling. But, she loves you. And you deserve answers.

( He sighs. )

Anything else you need to get off your chest before we head back downstairs. Anything else that might help me?

[He takes a deep breath, before shaking his head.]

I was born in October so this guy was probably around in ... January of 99? If that helps when you're asking around.

[A pause.]

Also feel free to warn me in advance if he's gonna suck.

January '99, got it.

( He puts that into his phone. )

If you think of anything else, just send it to me. You want me to fill your mom and you in with what I find or... just you? And, as I go, or, after I find everything I can?

( He frowns, though. He hopes the guy won't suck. )

[Ben takes a deep breath, trying to figure out the answers to those questions, because they're not easy.]

As you go works, I guess? I'm not sure I'm gonna be good with waiting.

[A pause as he considers.]

And yeah. Loop Mom in too.

Okay. World's most awkward group chat ever incoming.

( He starts it between the two of them, labels it Who Is Adam Milligan? Relabels it 23andU2. He chuckles to himself. )

You know I'm going to start tomorrow. Like if there's anything out there. I've been itching to get my hands on a project.

I know. And I appreciate it.

[He just needs to get it out of his hands, because he was not an investigator and he's only going to be able to get so far.]

I wouldn't trust it to anyone else.

That and you're a knucklehead.

( But so's he and knuckleheads gotta stick together, don't they? And they probably trust each other the most, and then their parents. )

We should get back down there. Minimize emotional blowback.

( Also booze is down there. )

(no subject)

acdc_rules - 2025-03-24 00:09 (UTC) - Expand

[He picks up the bottle of wine, pouring her a glass before passing it over to her.]

You can sit there, be beautiful, and tell me how we're feeling about all of this while Ben is out of earshot.

[Because he knows Lisa has to be having some feelings about the specter of Ben's father reentering their life.]

( She takes a bigger gulp than she should as the mayor who could be called at any time, but she feels entitled. She shakes her head, moving to the kitchen island and setting her drink down. )

No, no, give me something to - to chop. Or, hit hard.

( She sighs. Please assign her a task, but in the meantime, she just barrels forward. )

It's not that I don't understand why he's curious, it's just -- if he ever did it, why wouldn't we do it together? Or, why wouldn't he talk to me beforehand? Because he wasn't going to tell me yet, that's for sure.

[Okay, he can give her something to chop. Mashed potatoes are up next, so he places the peeled spuds down in front of her for her to chop into quarters before going into the pot.]

When Ben and I have talked about his dad - few and far between, but it has happened - I don't think it's a desire he's particularly proud of. It's something he does want to leave in the past but there's a part of him that can't, and that can be hard to talk about. But I don't think he didn't include you to hurt you.

[Doesn't change that it did hurt her, but the hurt wasn't intentional.]

He didn't hurt - Okay. It hurts that he didn't come to me. And maybe it hurts him that I never made any effort to reach out to ( a sigh ) his father.

( she can totally quarter potatoes. )

I hate that I can't do anything? Like, I genuinely remember nothing about this man. He made zero impression. Which means that either I've blocked him out, or don't remember him, or even the sex. And who cares about the sex, I got Ben. And I love Ben and I wanted ( the knife goes up with that word, then resumes quartering. ) Ben.

Maybe that's all that matters. That you two got each other out of the equation. Realistically, there's still a chance that this man may wind up being a disappointment. And there's also a chance that he doesn't even want to meet the guy. He just wants the answer to the question.

[Sometimes an answer can do a lot to soothe any questions. If only Rudy knew what a can of worms Ben and Dickerson were about to open up. He slides the turkey into the oven before placing his hands on her shoulders gently.]

You raised a good kid, Lisa. He'll figure it out.

I know.

( He leans against him. )

And I know my son. If he's out there, if someone is out there, Ben will meet him. And that's okay. And, is it crazy I don't want him to be a disappointment? It's the last thing Ben needs and - I'd rather there be something to find. Maybe this isn't a bad thing. Just a surprising thing.

[He smiles at that as he wraps his arms around her and pulls her in close.]

Maybe. And maybe it'll answer some questions for you too.

[He can't imagine it's been easy, having no idea who fathered your child. Maybe this can put those parts of her to rest as well.]

And him.

( She puts the knife down and turns around. )

I'm really lucky I found you, you know that?

You know, I'm not really one to toot my own horn, but I have to agree with that.

[He smiles as he smooths a hand over her back.]

But I got pretty lucky too.

I'm a handful, Sorrenson.

( But his hands feel that, don't they. )

God, I just hope he's going to --

( She hears her phone ding and pulls it out. She holds it out to Rudy. )

I'm officially a part of Who Is Adam Milligan. Sounds like a True Crime doc. Oh, that reminds me, we have to finish the Winnipeg Whiteout tonight.

( Serial killers in a blizzard. )

[His phone buzzes in his pocket, as he fishes it out and looks with a smile.]

Me too. It's nice to be included.

[He puts his phone back on his pocket and nods.]

But yes. As soon as the boys go home, it's a date for you, me and the leftover pie.

And the dead ice road truckers.

( It's quite the show! )