because the lives of the wicked should be made brief

[somanyadjectives]

Comments

[unforgivably]

I was brainwashed by a siren. You know what she did? Edited herself into all of our greatest hits so I'd stay loyal. Stripped my humanity away. That's an oldie-but-a-goody. Stefan, too, recruited by the devil. How many times can I say that I'm sorry about Matt Donovan?!

( He raises his voice a little too loudly for the airport, as he looks around himself. )

[braveandstupid]

I know, Damon!

[She knows. She knows it wasn't his fault. But that doesn't mean that him apologizing fixes it. Not when she was already seeing all cracks in their relationship that she couldn't unsee.]

And you only had to apologize once. But it wasn't going to change the fact that I wasn't happy. And I didn't see a way of fixing that. I didn't want to hurt you, but holding on was only going to make it worse.

[unforgivably]

We were. We were happy, Elena. I remember it and you remember it. We made real plans.

( And then Lily and Kai and everyone else fucked it all up. She was going to go to med school and he was going to own a bar. They had it worked out. )

[braveandstupid]

I'm not saying we weren't. But things change. I changed.

[She scrubs a hand over her face, trying not to cave and hang up. But she feels like she needs to shove a nail into this coffin that apparently has been lingering open for over a decade without her realizing it.]

And now I'm in love with someone else.

[Because she is. With someone who makes her laugh, and respects her choices and wants what she wants without it feeling like he's doing it just to make her happy.]

[unforgivably]

And I held out.

( Except for Krystal with a K. )

Because, in the end, what got me through Sybil the Siren's enslavement, Stefan's return to the dark side, oh and literal hellfire is remembering you would wake up one day. And we'd be together. Like we promised.

( He sighs, holding his fist tightly in the air. )

Maybe you missed it, or didn't believe Ric or Jo or, hell, Caroline who helped get me out of my own head, ( again, literally. ) but I grew. I evolved.

( He shakes his head, stalking away from a child staring at him. )

I broke Sybil's hold on me, I forgave my brother, I ascended. I was a new man. It's never going to be enough, Elena. Even though you and I both know we were. ...I'm obviously not pitching a redux to Damon and Elena, the tortured years.

( What is he even doing! )

[braveandstupid]

Were, Damon. We were happy. Until I wasn't.

[Or maybe it was just that he was happy and he wants to waste more time telling her how she was supposed to feel.

In fact, Elena's going to ask him just that question.]

What are you doing, Damon? Why bring all this up now?

[unforgivably]

Because we never have! Because I stood by and accepted things changed and had my little Mystic Falls life and championed your medical career, ( and tried the hardest to be friends but they never were. they were never going to. and someone brought all this shit up he hadn't been thinking about.

but almost on cue, elena's call waiting rings with her dad's name coming up if she looks down at her phone. has she been talking to Damon for that long? )

[braveandstupid]

[Elena takes a deep breath, pulling her phone away from her ear and seeing her father calling. She doesn't want to keep having this conversation, spinning in circles, because none of the answers she gives him are going to make him happy.

And she can't keep standing in this airport, trying to hold her feelings together so that she's not causing a scene in public. She swallows wanting to say that she wasn't keeping him there, that it wasn't her fault, that she didn't need him to be her champion and just pushes forward.]

Well, we have now. I have to go.

[She pauses because even with all of this, she still does care.]

I really hope you find what you need, Damon.

[And with that, she hangs up and calls her father back as she grabs her bag to resume exiting the airport.]

Hi, Dad. Sorry, I got another call. I'm on my way out.

[founderscouncil]

They wouldn't let me sit, so they sent me back around. I'll be another five minutes.

( He's a little stressed about that, so misses that he's interrupted something possibly sad, and it gets tabled until he pulls up to the curb in person.

Putting his emergency flashers on, he steps out. )

Sorry, sorry. I remember when we used to drop off and pick up without being bothered. ( Taking her suitcase in hand, his father instincts kick in. ) Are you okay?

[braveandstupid]

What?

[She blinks in surprise, almost as though she hadn't expected him to ask that, and shakes it off. In some ways she still is a little shell shocked from the conversation, but that's not really something she wants to get into with her father.]

No, I'm fine. It was just ... a complicated phone call.

[founderscouncil]

Is it work?

( He doesn't know what to ask about, knowing his daughter's life is complicated. He doesn't want it to be Dean. He knows Dean left suddenly and hasn't (isn't?) return(ed/ing). But, he shakes the question away, taking her suitcase and placing it into the trunk. He gives her space she probably needs to collect herself and climb into the front seat.

Shutting the trunk, he sits back in the front seat.

He changes the subject. )

Airports used to be easy to navigate.

[braveandstupid]

I went to one in New Jersey, that's just driveways winding around like a knot, one on top of the other. That was a nightmare to get out of and I wasn't even driving.

[She glances out the window as she settles before shaking her head.]

And no, it wasn't work.

[founderscouncil]

You survived.

( To see her parents back. But, he can literally only imagine. )

Well, whatever it is, if you want to talk about it, I'm here. I know things are strained, and your mom and I messed up, but, we are still your parents. And if I can be there for you, I will.

[braveandstupid]

[Part of her is tempted. She wants to talk about it some, but given what her parents already know about Damon, she isn't sure she wants to breach this conversation with context.]

It was an ex. A long time ago ex. He ... wanted to rehash some stuff from our breakup.

[founderscouncil]

Sounds like it came from out of left field.

( He only intuits, but lets her drive the conversation as he drives the car. They have two hours, and he will let her rest if she needs it, but he wants to be there. )

[braveandstupid]

Yes and no. Our relationship was always ... high drama. Part of the reason I ended it, honestly.

[She rubs her arms as she looks out the window as they drive.]

But he's probably one of the most selfish things I've ever done.

[founderscouncil]

( That's a way to phrase it. )

Sometimes, we get to be selfish.

( At a certain point, you choose your partner. And your kids. You choose your life, selfish as it may be. And he had his selfish side. He had Augustine. He wore many faces. Town practitioner. Father. Brother. Scientist. Founding family member. )

[unforgivably]

Elena.

( But, she hangs up on him. He breaks the phone in his hand, something he hasn't done in frustration in, well, ever. He drops the pieces of it onto the ground with a sigh as he bends over and grabs the sim card still intact.

Now he has another errand to run.

So, he does the mundane thing. He goes to the freaking store and compels himself a new one. He has no patience. He even gets a free upgrade, how about that!

And he gets the "RED" model because that's all they have. It's fine. He's fine.

He's not. )

[somanyadjectives]

[Eventually, after she gets in the car with her father, Elena will text Stefan that Damon may be in a bad way, and it's probably a good idea to check on him. Stefan will consider calling, but given that it's Elena that's upset him, he knows a phone call probably isn't going to do it. So he leaves Buffy, briefly, on some kind of New Orleans ghost tour, and tracks down his brother.

It takes checking a few bars before he finds his brother, and he slides up onto the barstool next to him, glancing at his drink curiously.]

What are we drinking?

[unforgivably]

( Damon leaves his new phone on Do Not Disturb as he scrolls something meaningless.

He is still a creature of habit, so he find somewhere to drown his sorrows. He compels himself the entire bottle, knowing witches are in the quarter, and that he's taking a chance. And if it gets his ass kicked.

Maybe he deserves it.

His ass isn't kicked, though. And he gets the bottle, a glass, and some kind of free appetizer he doesn't touch.

His brother finds him easily. He lifts the bottle, not turning. )

Blanton's.

( For now. )

How'd you find me?

[somanyadjectives]

[Stefan signals for his own glass, and pours himself some from Damon's bottle.]

Not a lot of bars in the Quarter. I tried a couple until I found you.

[He figured Damon wouldn't answer his phone, but he's not about to outright say that.]

[unforgivably]

Let me guess. Elena.

( The L pops out of his mouth, tongue flicking against his upper teeth, feeling every signal. )

[somanyadjectives]

She did text me saying that you were having a hard time.

[He takes a sip of the drink and reaches for some of the abandoned appetizer, popping it in his mouth.]

She didn't tell me why though.

[unforgivably]

( He picked a fight with her. He excavated meaning behind the end of their relationship. He tried to say goodbye. )

You know I've never been good with goodbyes, Brother. I made it her problem. ( He makes a face, deciding to be honest. ) StepKlaus took me on as a client. That's right. I'm going into therapy.

[somanyadjectives]

Wow.

[Stefan does not bother to hide his surprise, because, well, it's Damon. It would probably be disingenuous if he wasn't surprised.]

That's a surprisingly healthy decision for you.