[That wasn't what he meant, Dean. Why do you do that? But he can read the dismissal as clearly as anything else, so he sets his jaw in frustration and does as requested. He disappears.
As easily dismissed as he is summoned.
Twenty minutes later, Dean's phone begins to ring, Sam's name flashing on the caller ID.]
He's only another glass in, now sitting on the front astroturf and watching a happy foreign family in the pool down below. He knows he was cold. He knows he was the dick. He knows it's not black and freaking white.
He answers, finally. He wants to blurt out that he's entitled to how he feels. But, instead, he answers like every hunter answers. Just in case it's not Sam and someone's spoofing Sam. Freaking habit. )
[In some ways, their expanded social circle has benefitted Sam in a lot of ways. It's one thing to be the only person to handle Dean's moods. Now he can outsource them to their mother. Or Dean's girlfriend. In fact, he would much rather hand it off to Elena, but unfortunately for Sam, she's on-call for the hospital so she can't really be on the phone working through why Cas showed up late at night to say "Dean is mad at me for things I can't control, please make him be reasonable."
(Also, he checked, and she's already on the phone.)
It's not exactly what Cas said, but it was in the look. After over a decade, Sam at least understands the looks.
So Sam sighs picks up his phone, and when he does answer his tone isn't judgmental one way or another. He just wants to understand what's wrong.]
( Or, anyone? Why is he pissed at Cas. Let him count the number of ways Cas continues to keep everything close to the vest and then they just end up with jack, squat, or some combination therein. )
Well, in the past, I would already be there and already know why you're mad and would be able to slowly talk you down off the ledge over the course of several weeks. I think he figured since I'm not actually there, he'd bring the fact that you were pissed to my attention.
[Full little brother entitlement in his tone here. He doesn't particularly care about why Dean is mad, but Cas is annoyed enough to fix it.]
Also he saved my life in San Francisco so apparently I owe him one. Why are you mad?
Allison and I got pulled into some kind of pocket world by the minions of the witches we were looking to salt and burn. I called, Cas came, and he took out some of the minions before they could get us.
[It takes a second before Sam connects the dots. Like yes, of course the angels knew all the members of their family. They were obsessed with the Winchesters, in order to ensure that they had all the ... oh.
Oh.
They would know that, wouldn't they?]
You're mad because Cas didn't tell you.
[Again, his tone is relatively neutral. He can understand why Dean would be upset about that. But he's also not going to get angry on his brother's behalf either.]
( And that doesn't even begin to cover it. But, go on Sam. Smooth it on over. Make this better somehow. Because he can't get around it. Ben's messed up. And it's his fault. (Dean's, not Cas'. But he has to be mad at someone. )
Because what I'm hearing is that you're mad about him keeping a secret that wasn't his to tell in the first place. Revealing who Ben's father was wasn't on him, it was on Lisa.
And Lisa didn't even know, Sam. Didn't even ask. Just assumed I wasn't. Or, lived with me with an entire year and didn't say a damn word. You know what they meant to me. You know he felt like my kid. He was my kid, Sam.
( Except, he IS and he always WAS. No matter what he said. )
[He pauses trying to figure out what the problem is.]
Look, man, up until now I figured that Lisa and Ben were like ... your Stanford. You tried to pretend that everything else wasn't shitty and violent and awful and just ... have the life you always wanted. And just like Stanford it all came crashing down in the truly spectacular fashion that was our lives back then.
We all made shitty choices that year. But would Cas telling you then have actually made anything better?
[Sam speaks as someone who was raised by both Dean and John Winchester. There are things he'd trust Dean with that he would never give to John. Dean always kept him safe, even if it isn't the kind of safety Sam would prefer.]
And you made mistakes, but you can try and do better. You have a choice now.
[Not to say that they didn't have choices then, but feels far more open than it used to be.]
[Castiel makes him way just a little bit longer than he should, because he can, but also maybe he's a little tired of these Winchesters summoning him all over the place. It was quiet for so long and now it's four times in one weekend.
But eventually he does appear and nods.]
Yes, you are.
[He learned to speak Winchester enough for that to translate to "apology accepted."]
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everyonelives2025-07-26 07:05 pm
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As easily dismissed as he is summoned.
Twenty minutes later, Dean's phone begins to ring, Sam's name flashing on the caller ID.]
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He's only another glass in, now sitting on the front astroturf and watching a happy foreign family in the pool down below. He knows he was cold. He knows he was the dick. He knows it's not black and freaking white.
He answers, finally. He wants to blurt out that he's entitled to how he feels. But, instead, he answers like every hunter answers. Just in case it's not Sam and someone's spoofing Sam. Freaking habit. )
Yeah?
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(Also, he checked, and she's already on the phone.)
It's not exactly what Cas said, but it was in the look. After over a decade, Sam at least understands the looks.
So Sam sighs picks up his phone, and when he does answer his tone isn't judgmental one way or another. He just wants to understand what's wrong.]
Why are you pissed at Cas?
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( Or, anyone? Why is he pissed at Cas. Let him count the number of ways Cas continues to keep everything close to the vest and then they just end up with jack, squat, or some combination therein. )
He came running to you? Really?
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[Full little brother entitlement in his tone here. He doesn't particularly care about why Dean is mad, but Cas is annoyed enough to fix it.]
Also he saved my life in San Francisco so apparently I owe him one. Why are you mad?
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( You first, bitch. )
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Allison and I got pulled into some kind of pocket world by the minions of the witches we were looking to salt and burn. I called, Cas came, and he took out some of the minions before they could get us.
[Not that interesting a story. Your turn.]
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I walked into one of Ben's bars. Kid didn't hit me or yell at me. He actually listened. We shot a game of pool.
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[He lets the silence sit between them, comfortable acknowledgement, before following up with:]
And that led to you being mad at Cas why?
[Oh, did you think Sam was letting go of that bone? No, no he is not.]
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( Ugh, why pick at a scab when it's just starting to form. )
Ben pointed out how all-knowing angels are. You know, the angels that tracked down and resurrected our half-brother to stick Michael inside him.
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[It takes a second before Sam connects the dots. Like yes, of course the angels knew all the members of their family. They were obsessed with the Winchesters, in order to ensure that they had all the ... oh.
Oh.
They would know that, wouldn't they?]
You're mad because Cas didn't tell you.
[Again, his tone is relatively neutral. He can understand why Dean would be upset about that. But he's also not going to get angry on his brother's behalf either.]
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( And that doesn't even begin to cover it. But, go on Sam. Smooth it on over. Make this better somehow. Because he can't get around it. Ben's messed up. And it's his fault. (Dean's, not Cas'. But he has to be mad at someone. )
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I don't think you're wrong for being mad.
[He will validate that much of Dean's feelings.]
But I don't think he can do anything to change that now either.
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( he could've apologized. explained it better. said anything. )
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[That's what Sam's really confused about.]
Because what I'm hearing is that you're mad about him keeping a secret that wasn't his to tell in the first place. Revealing who Ben's father was wasn't on him, it was on Lisa.
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( Except, he IS and he always WAS. No matter what he said. )
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[He pauses trying to figure out what the problem is.]
Look, man, up until now I figured that Lisa and Ben were like ... your Stanford. You tried to pretend that everything else wasn't shitty and violent and awful and just ... have the life you always wanted. And just like Stanford it all came crashing down in the truly spectacular fashion that was our lives back then.
We all made shitty choices that year. But would Cas telling you then have actually made anything better?
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( Or, died trying. Or brought the both of them to the brink, bloody and violent. )
I think about our lives, about the Mark of Cain, being a demon, Michael, Jack. Chuck. I'm dad, man. I've always been dad. I'll always be dad.
( He pushed Ben, attacked him. Went hunter on him when Lisa was in danger. Decided on what was best for him without asking. )
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[Sam speaks as someone who was raised by both Dean and John Winchester. There are things he'd trust Dean with that he would never give to John. Dean always kept him safe, even if it isn't the kind of safety Sam would prefer.]
And you made mistakes, but you can try and do better. You have a choice now.
[Not to say that they didn't have choices then, but feels far more open than it used to be.]
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( Okay. Maybe Sam has a point that none of this is about Cas. He places the phone against his forehead with a sigh. )
Cas! Hold on.
( He mutes Sam and sits back. Sees if Cas answers... he doesn't deserve it. He knows it. )
I was an ass okay. Took my crap put on you. I'm the dick.
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But eventually he does appear and nods.]
Yes, you are.
[He learned to speak Winchester enough for that to translate to "apology accepted."]
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Sam, I gotta call you back.
( And yoink, he ends that call. Being abrupt everywhere. )
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Castiel takes the olive branch and moves to sit, and will at least own up to his part in the mess that was Season 6.]
I know I didn't make things easy for you back then. I am sorry about that.
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( He clinks the glass against the bottle. )
Sam said you rescued him from a pocket dimension.
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[Cas takes a swig from the bottle before continuing.]
From what I understood, the witches who set it up were intending to bodyjack their occupants. They're dead now.
[Separate from Cas' role in things, but still a good point to be made.]
Sam didn't seem surprised by any of it so I assume it was part of the hunt he and Allison were on.
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