for the rest of us death will be a relief

[praevaricatio]

Comments

GROUP TEXTS

[slavophile]

the william-approved filter to their vast and wide network

[cholesterol]

Sound off, anyone in our network get anyone back today? Maybe in the last five minutes. Elena, Sam, and me got some blasts from our pasts.

1/2

[extrasauce]

[Oh that's so many numbers of new people that she doesn't know. She'll play detective and add them as we go.]

Sioux Falls here, we had one. A woman named Fred Burkle. Not from my past, but from some friends'.

done

[letsbe_clear]

[By the time this text goes out, Cordelia has been fished out and brought up to speed.]

Thanks for handling that, Jody. We really appreciate it.

beacon hills (derek, cora, malia, parrish, scott, stiles, allison, lydia)

[notwitty]

[Isaac is not doing this in the big group chat. So he's going to make Derek say it elsewhere.]

Erica? Are you sure?

[engender]

She looks like her and she's using her name. Aiden is an hour away.

law enforcement chat

[patrols]

[Naturally, Lindsay opens this with aplomb.]

[patrols]

Okay, to actual business.

It looks like we have a count of seven so far. Two in Baltimore, four in New Orleans, one in Sioux Falls. Has anyone heard anything else?

earp chat (waverly, wynonna, dolls, doc, alice)

[stupetballs]

[Alice is included in this by accident but she is here for the family drama.]

I think Julian might be one of the returned. Tyler was given the name Charlie but he was asking for me. I'm asking him to send me a picture, and I'm going to try and get on a train.

Where are you guys?

[And then, after a minute:]

If you haven't been paying attention to the group chat, people who were previously dead are randomly appearing in different places.

[dollywood]

He did NOT give the name Charlie.

[cowman]

Henry is having a playdate. Friends have a small pool. It could be Julian has been suppressed once again.

hales (derek, peter, cora, malia, laura eventually once she gets a phone)

[impetere]

[While they're waiting for Caroline to arrive and once food has been delivered, and Laura has gone off to devour some of it, Cora will do the thing that needs to be done for the members of their family that aren't here in Beacon Hills. And unfortunately she has to start with context for Peter since he isn't in the other group chats.

Like everything else Cora, she's going to be direct and to the point.]

In case you haven't heard (Peter), a bunch of dead people have been popping up all over the place. We had three in Beacon Hills.

One of them was Laura.

[There, now Malia can stop being cagey in the other group chats because all the Hales know.]

1/2

[worksinprogress]

Define "popping up all over the place."

I do love a good callout in the family group chat, or I would if I've ever been included in one.

I assume the reason I've been omitted before now is the reason you're sending this auspicious message.

2/2

[engender]

Not now, Peter.

It's Laura? You're sure?

azumas assemble, accidentally including asa - she meant for it to be business azumas minus bros 5, 6

[richrisque]

Good morning. I know gossip travels fast and at least one of you always likes to keep eyes on the cameras, so I'll say this once. Yes, Elton resurfaced. Yes, he's in his usual room.

Don't poke him. Don't prod him. You can say hello. You can share a coffee. You cannot wrestle him, antagonize him, or make fun of how bad his bedhead is.

Please acknowledge you got this message.

1/2

[enumerating]

[👍Hiro Azuma liked this message.]

done

[enumerating]

Do these rules also apply to Pasha? Mostly in the sense that he will sit on him the moment he sees him.

[Pasha being his old man chocolate lab.

Also Ken leaves the message on read but does not respond because he's a brat.]

mystic falls (bonnie, elena, tyler, matt, damon, caroline, jeremy)

[somanyadjectives]

Some of you have heard this already but Kai's back. We don't fully know why yet, but somehow, when they broke the Gemini Curse, he and Jo were unmerged somehow.

The bad news is that they're still connected, so anything that happens to Kai happens to Jo.

The good news, is they're still connected so Kai is invested in keeping Jo alive, for now. Knowing him, he's probably going to find a way around it eventually but for right now, he's stuck.

[He doesn't trust this turning over a brand new leaf bullshit.]

I don't know what Jo is going to do yet, but I promised I would keep people updated, so. This is the update I have.

1 / tbd i mean

[unforgivably]

More. Freaking. Linking. Do we know if Kai did this, if this is his contingency plan? Very 200-whatever. Very Katherine Pierce.

[moralitypolice]

I know I came from a place of anger, but, Kai inside the spell's mind palace didn't feel... pushy. Or, like he always did. He didn't even asked for forgiveness. He helped, threw me the key and let us out without him.

Not saying I trust him any farther I can fling him with magic.

If he and Jo are still linked, we do have to consider that MAYBE Jo's psyche is still linked to him, too.

Doesn't make him less dangerous but it might make things less precarious. Until, like Stefan said, he trips in either direction.

[barely]

Just keep him away from Elena and Bonnie.

[woodenbullets]

I second Jer.

[recrudesce]

Can we get a little more information on the linking. Like, his pain is hers?

DONE

[unforgivably]

Which brings me back to, could Kai have done the linking. Played nice in the mind palace. Playing nice now. Knows it's more complicated now?

parker chat (liv, luke, shep, josie, lizzie, ric)

[saveslives]

[Coming at you now without a lot of information because Stefan is an asshole.]

We don't know why yet, but just so you all know, Kai and I were unmerged, kind of. We're still connected - what happens to me, happens to him and vice versa - but we're in two separate bodies.

We haven't decided what we're going to do and we're not in Mystic Falls right now. I will keep you all updated once we decide on a plan.