because the lives of the wicked should be made brief

[somanyadjectives]

Comments

[cholesterol]

Your mom told me...

( This is not an excuse. He stops himself. )

Heaven found your uncle Adam. Resurrected him, used him to get to us. Michael ended up in him when all was said and done. He's still in him. ( It's a long story. ) Guess - they - ( But, now Ben brings up a good point and momentarily his blood boils. Heaven knew about Adam. Heaven knew about Adam. ) Sonnuvabitch.

[acdc_rules]

[Ben raises his eyebrow because yeah. Seems unlikely that Heaven at least didn't know. But it says at least one small thing in their favor that they didn't try to manipulate a kid into doing what they wanted.]

Guess you have to go have a conversation with your angel friend?

[cholesterol]

Later. I'm here with you.

( He's chewed Cas out before. Might even mean he ices him out for a while. Depends on what his response is when asked. )

And I get a question. You uh - you like Rudy?

[acdc_rules]

Yeah, I like Rudy.

[Ben takes a swig to finish his soda before shrugging.]

I thought he was a little corny at first, but I was like fifteen and all adults trying to be nice to me were corny. And don't get me wrong, he is, but ... it grows on you. And he's been really good for Mom.

[So yes, to answer the question Dean asked poorly, Rudy has been very good to Lisa.]

[cholesterol]

( Well, ain't that what he was asking. Glad he got around to what matters. )

Good, good he's good for her. Believes in her. He's a shrink.

( The way he spoke, how he put certain things, kept everything in perspective. Somehow, still rooted for Dean. But, gave him the stern warning he deserved. )

That ever get old?

[acdc_rules]

Technically he's not allowed to shrink us. Unethical.

[At the same time.]

But he's not afraid to call you on your shit, which honestly I needed as a teenager. And he's a really good listener. It's not all bad.

[There's a lot of verbal affirmations and giving him space to feel his feelings without judgement, but he's not going to get into that. He remembers, vaguely, how Dean felt about chick flick moments way back when.]

[cholesterol]

( He never said it was.

Someone from in the kitchen brings Damon his burger and fries as he finishes his beer. He lifts it up for Ben's little friend to see he needs another, if she can, he's not sweating it if she misses him or not. )

You uh - yeah, you were Lisa's kid. I can imagine. ( He also remembers him as a smaller kid, the first time, before he practically raised him for a year. ) You still like ACDC? Extra question - so - feel free.

[acdc_rules]

I liked ACDC before you. I'll keep liking them long after you're gone.

[That's a stupid question. ACDC rules.

Also Helene is great at her job, so she'll swing around after things cool down to drop off another beer and take the empty glasses.

But it's Ben's turn, so he'll get up and sink one more (16), and he asks the first genuinely curious question he has that isn't just finding where the guard rails are.]

The first time I called, a woman answered the phone. It wasn't Elena. You guys have a whole crew at the bunker?

[That's not the actual question. The woman knew who Lisa and Ben were. He figures he doesn't talk about them to just anyone. But he doesn't know how to ask who she is or if he'll actually answer.]

[cholesterol]

Ouch.

( He deserves that? And, he knows when his time is up, it's up. Except for every time it wasn't.

Dean can also feel the bumpers go free as Ben attempts a real shot at a strike so-to-speak, without the worry of a gutter ball. A real question, and one with a lot of answers. )

More like a network. We have hunters that come in and out, that were uh - rescued from somewhere else. And, lately, Elena and some of her friends, her family, have also been staying with us when they needed us. ( As for ) The woman who answered the phone - is Mary. She's - a long story. She's - ( A beat. ) Your grandmother.

[acdc_rules]

[His eyebrows go up at that, turning to study his face for a moment.]

I thought she was dead. I mean, I know that can get a bit ... flexible with you, but I thought she was dead dead.

[cholesterol]

( He may not have shared everything with Ben, had scolded him when he even breathed a word of being a hunter, but he was open about Sam. About their parents. About what they lost. )

Long story short, a powerful - entity ( God's sister. ) looked inside my mind once and deduced my ultimate wish. She brought her back. Hell of an adjustment period, but, we're all copacetic now.

[acdc_rules]

Huh.

[That "huh" sounds a little more curious than he'd care to admit. He doesn't have a strong connection with Lisa's parents and Rudy's parents are nice, but they aren't his.]

Must have been nice. To have her back, I mean.

[cholesterol]

Like I said, there was an adjustment period. She'd been dead for years. Didn't get technology. Didn't know how to relate to her adult sons. She did a few stints away. Fell in with the wrong crowd. Grew as a person. She still likes having her own life, but she's around a lot more and actually hangs her hat when she can.

( She's flawed, but good.

And he knows Bobby's as placeholder as he gets, but he treats her well. )

[acdc_rules]

[Mary would object to the word placeholder. Just because she has healthier relationships post the death of the love of her life than her husband did doesn't make him a placeholder.

But whatever makes Dean feel better.

Ben nods, before stepping back from the table and going back to his soda.]

Still sounds nice.

[But since he screwed up his last shot, and he doesn't know where to go from there he deflects back to the game.]

Your turn.

[cholesterol]

( He wants his mom happy and he has his own issues with his dad. But he also remember what the pearl gave them back.

Another ball drops. And he misses the next. )

Did you go to school?

[acdc_rules]

Trade school.

[He debates expanding on that, but eventually he manages to wrestle out the rest of the conversation.]

I thought about going to college for engineering, but it was too much money.

[cholesterol]

Engineering. Takes brains.

( He knows Ben had it in him. )

How'd trade school treat you?

[acdc_rules]

It was fine.

[It was a tool to get him where he needed to go. It wasn't really an experience the way college would have been.]

Got me an apprenticeship in a good garage, and if things keep going well, I'll probably take over when my boss retires.

[cholesterol]

You wanna? Take over for him?

( He wants to know everything, how the Ben he pushed away became this Ben. How the Ben who had his memory erased - who he became. What he wants. )

You were a natural.

( Maybe at more things than one, if he had treated Ben differently. Stayed. Not made the unilateral decision for everyone. But he was never going to raise him into the life. Was there a happy medium? A way to teach him to shoot a gun? Defend himself? )

[acdc_rules]

Yeah. It's a good job, makes good money. I've worked worse jobs.

[He just doesn't like how it feels like people don't take him seriously, though maybe that's just the people he's choosing to pursue and not anything to do with his job.]

[cholesterol]

Yeah. Before there?

( Because of money? He's never been made of money, but he could have contributed. He doesn't know where Ben would have fit into any of it, but he would have made room.

He doubts that would have been safe and he'd become so angry over the years. Maybe it's better this is now and not then. He remembers holding Lisa and Ben at arms' length after Sam's return. They led a pretty good, fucked up year. They both accepted him. And for a time, he felt like Ben was his son. )

I'm sorry.

[acdc_rules]

Every teenager has a shitty retail job in high school.

[Nothing super out of the ordinary though.

Ben does sit with that apology for a minute though, but given that they haven't been talking about any of Dean's specific crimes against Ben, he's not exactly sure what the apology is for.]

For what part?

[cholesterol]

All of it. Ducking out. Crashing back into your life. Again.

( But, he wants to be a part of it. He knows that. He wouldn't be here, otherwise. )

[acdc_rules]

[Ben nods, because he's not sure forgiveness is on the table just yet for all the things he lost, but he's not seething with rage anymore. So that's ... something.]

Technically I called you. So that one's on me.

[cholesterol]

Look, if I'm honest, and I know you don't know what to think about me - but, I remember what I was like after Sam showed back up. I became erratic. A prison warden. There was night - ( He sets the beer aside, and faces his son proper, straight shooting. ) You know my jobs get messy. But, that night I came back and I woke you up and I - ( shoved him. ) It wasn't safe to be around me and, I got that cleared up but, even after, I kept it all away from you. Didn't explain things to your mother. ( And got his ass handed to him. ) I keep everything close to my chest, because I think it keeps people safe. past tense. Kept. I've -- learned to be a bit more of an open book. Doesn't mean I wallow in all my big feelings, but -- look, I said it before, but I said it cheap and I said it desperate. You and me. I'm not going anywhere. I won't. And even if I have to, I'm coming back. I want in. I got the crap father lottery, and like hell am I going to let you have it, too.